Wake up every morning and tell yourself that you’re a badass bitch from hell and that no one can fuck with you and then don’t let anybody fuck with you.
Kate Nash’s advice to college students  (via einhorny)
Cop: Have you been drinking?
Me: I been drankin'
Cop: Surfbort
Me: Surfbort
Never beg someone to stay
my five word story (via curse-of-curvess)